7 Powerful Reminders for When You’re Feeling Like a Failure as a Mom

You finally got the last kid to bed and you’re praying no one gets up…again! You’re physically and emotionally exhausted since the kids didn’t seem to listen to you ALL DAY. You lost your temper and yelled at them, and your house has toys and piles of papers everywhere. It feels like you didn’t get anything done besides breaking up arguments, feeding the kids (cereal and string cheese count, right?), and nursing the baby. Your husband is working late, and you hate to tell him there are only leftovers for dinner. You’re feeling like a failure as a mom.

Can I tell you that you are NOT alone? Every mom has rough days (or weeks), some more than others. So, Mama…wipe away those tears. God’s got this! Let’s get your focus up instead of on what’s going on around you.

Why Do I Feel Like a Bad Mom?

Our minds are complex things. One minute we feel like we’re doing pretty well, and the next we feel like such a failure as a mom. We think we’ll mess our kids up forever. In those moments, we need to be reminded of truth…God’s truth. You’re not a bad mom, but we all do have a sinful nature, including you.

You’re listening to the lies of the Enemy

When you feel like a failure, you’re listening to the lies of Satan. He’d like nothing better than to have you feeling inadequate as a mom. He tells you you’re not doing good enough or you’re not fun enough. He tempts you to feel like you just can’t do it and that everyone else is doing better than you. These are LIES! 1 Peter 5:8-9 tells us that Satan is prowling around like a lion looking for prey, and that we need to resist him.

“The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy. I came that they may have life and have it abundantly.” John 10:10 ESV

Truths for when you’re feeling like a failure as a mom

Instead of listening to Satan’s lies, we need to combat the lies with God’s truth. So, what are some ways we can combat the lies with truth when we are feeling like we’re failing as a mom?

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Combat lies with God’s truth

There are several ways we can combat Satan’s lies. We need to get God’s truth into our heads and into our hearts instead of the lies that Satan has been telling us. Here are some ways we can do that.

  • Read and write down Scripture. God’s Word is the ultimate truth. Find verses that speak truth to you, or even start with some of the verses in this post. Read over them again and again. Write them down. Meditate on them and memorize them.
  • Pray. And pray. And pray. We need to be in constant prayer throughout the day. God can give us the wisdom we need.
  • Listen to worship and praise music. Hearing this music in the background will help keep our hearts and minds focused upward. It’s hard to lose patience with your child when you were just singing praise to the Lord.
  • Read wisdom from others who have been there. Loving the Little Years is a great book to help you keep perspective. Also, if you have the YouVersion Bible app, there is a devotion plan called “Overwhelmed by my Blessings” that is great, written by a mom of seven!
  • Journal. Get a cute journal, and write down your thoughts, what God is teaching you, and how you are combatting Satan’s lies with truth.

Remember who you are in Christ

When you are feeling like a failure as a mom, here are some great Scriptures to remind you who you are in Christ. Find your identity in Christ and not in Satan’s lies. There are definitely more, but these will get you started. Focus and dwell on these.

  • You are loved. God loves us. He loved us even when we were dead in our sins. Ephesians 2 has a great reminder of this.

“But God, being rich in mercy, because of the great love with which he loved us, even when we were dead in our trespasses, made us alive together with Christ—by grace you have been saved—” Ephesians 2:4,5

  • You are forgiven. Because of Jesus, the debt of sin has already been taken care of. We are forgiven because of what He has done. We only need to ask.

“In him we have redemption through his blood, the forgiveness of our trespasses, according to the riches of his grace,” Ephesians 1:7

  • You are a new creation. Again, because of what Jesus did, when we trust Him for our salvation we become a NEW creation.

“Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old has passed away; behold, the new has come.” 2 Corinthians 5:17

  • You are a work in progress. Yes, you messed up. You’re totally feeling inadequate and like a failure, but God is still doing a great work in you. How amazing is that??!!

“And I am sure of this, that he who began a good work in you will bring it to completion at the day of Jesus Christ.” Philippians 1:6

  • You are not condemned. This is a powerful truth. Because of Jesus, all our sins- past, present, and future- have been forgiven.

“There is therefore now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus.” Romans 8:1

What does the Bible say about the role of a mother? To learn more about being a godly mother, check out these 10 characteristics of a good mother according to the Bible.

God is consistent when life is overwhelming

Your life may feel like it’s chaotic, overwhelming, and impossible to navigate, but God’s truth reminds us that He is the same. According to Hebrews 13:8, God has been the same since before the world began. He is still the same and will remain the same.

Keep an Eternal perspective when you feel you’re failing

When we’re drowning in the day-to-day and feeling like we are such a failure, we need to re-focus our perspective. Remember the big picture. We are raising another generation of Christ-followers. Everything we do matters, and we need to do it all for the glory of God (1 Corinthians 10:31).

Failure gives you an opportunity to model repentance

We certainly don’t want to fail, but we do. That’s why you’re reading this. We’re all sinners, and when we repent of our sin and ask for forgiveness from God, we also need to ask for our children’s forgiveness. As we do this, we are modeling how as Christians we go from sin to repentance and forgiveness.

Know what Biblical motherhood is

Our current culture has a different view of motherhood than we should have as followers of Christ. Memes abound with around-the-clock coffee and “Is it Wine-thirty?” However, God has a different view and a different goal for us. We aren’t to conform to the world’s patterns, but instead, we are to fix our minds on Christ. He will change us from the inside out.

“Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect.” Romans 12:2

Motherhood is hard

Just because you had a bad day doesn’t make you a bad parent. Motherhood is so hard. It requires much of ourselves. We are models of Christ to our children, and we are responsible for raising them for the Lord. When we think of all we are to do and are responsible for, it is overwhelming! However, remember that God, the same God who raised Jesus from the dead, has already equipped us to do what He has called us to (Hebrews 13:20,21).

Put Truth into Practice

We’ve discussed that you are being lied to by Satan and that you need to combat those lies with truth. You have learned different ways to do that, and been reminded to keep an eternal perspective. Now, realize that feeling like a failure as a mom is a lie that you need to combat with God’s truth. What other lies about yourself do you tend to believe? Which verse are you going to go write down? Please comment below.

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(1) Comment

  1. Donna Nelson says:

    ‘Love your wisdom, Aimee, thanks for sharing your spectacular and realistic ideas and solutions! Thank you, also, for always pointing us to Jesus!

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